Once a month I conduct a community call with our community of TCM fertility experts, dealing with real life issues that show up as mental, emotional or physical imbalances, including infertility. Today we talked about the energies of emergence. As we move from winter into spring, nature expresses the energy of emergence. The seeds that have been hidden under ground sprout into shoots, which emerge through the soil as the hidden potential is being manifest. This very same energy is behind the reproductive capacity of a human being.
The water element, carried by the kidney system of energies, governs our genetic and reproductive potential, and how it can be either strengthened into a strong push of emergence, or depleted where its potential withers before it has a chance to emerge.
We looked at what constitutes that hidden potential. According to Chinese medicine, its basis is a strong sense of ones innate being, that gives rise to the will to live fully and reproduce oneself in the world. Physical means to support these energies are
through adequate sleep, rest, quiet, meditation, a warm foot soak in Epson salts, eating seeds, and nourishing foods like eggs with high potential energy, qi gong, reproductive and femoral massage, and acupuncture and herbs that tonify the kidney essence.. The strongest way to nourish the potential of the kidney energies is to know oneself fully, down to the core, without any masks or roles giving us our identity.
These potential energies can also be depleted by too much exercise, excitement, stimulation, not enough restoration and sleep; eating foods with low potential energy like refined carbohydrates and simple sugars. They are also held back by unexamined fears, which can lurk in the depths and drive unconscious behavior. Fears like “My life will not be worth anything if I don’t have a child.” These types of unconscious fears are counter to knowing and accepting oneself down to the core. When we move into these fears and acknowledge them, they lose their hold over us.
I invite you to look at these fears that might hold you back and bring them into the light where they have no power. What gives your life worth right now? Can you look at the value of your life without any roles, relationships, or external identities?
From here, the depths of your own inherent worth, there is potential for what can be. What emerges forth as your heart’s greatest longing? Sure, it comes in the form of the desire to have a child. But instead of holding onto the picture of a child as a goal oriented pursuit, bring it into an embodied reality. When you feel the desire for a child arise, what does it feel like in your body? What is the direct, felt experience of what you think it will feel like when that desire is fulfilled? Instead of waiting for the goal to be reached (a stressful pursuit which depletes the kidneys and obstructs the liver), bring it out of the mind and into the body. Feel the visceral sensation of its fulfillment. What does it feel like? Unconditional love? Joy? Feel those feelings now.
Turn your vision within. Find the source from which these energies arise. Look at what might be obstructing them. Let your deepest fears be uncovered. Move beyond them, so you can experience the fullness of your heart’s desire. Take it out of the mind, which will give it a picture, and instead plant the feeling in your body. Let that feeling guide you.
Finally, what is the ground of your life, as it is, that will be nourishing this seedling? How have you been nourishing your life? How much space is there in your life right now for yourself? For a child? What types of emotions are circulating through your system? Is it conducive to allowing new life to emerge? And can you cultivate a sense of faith that life, as it is, can find its way through you?
We will be working with these most potent energies of emergence at our next retreat. I hope to see you there.